Ok, so things get a tiny bit better, and then it goes back to the way it was before. I'm having serious doubts that he even wants this baby at fucking all. He can't hold a fucking conversation with me...it's like it's the most painful thing in the world to do it, and then he acts like I've wounded him fatally when I bring it up.
He has felt the baby move maybe five times in about seven months total. Like he doesn't give a shiyte about it at all.

I know that other people have said he's scared but FUCK...so am I. I'm gonna be 35, and having a baby. I had more support with the first one. I think that since the test came out positive, he's been happy maybe a total of a week, it seems. Jesus fucking christ almighty. It's not that bad to say, " Yeah, I'm terrified about what we are going to go through. " Maybe it would help MY outlook to know I'm not the only one terrified. He has no problem at all telling random fucking strangers on the internet his deepest goddamned inner most thoughts, but we can't even get as deep as to talk about the weather.

Sometimes I think it would be better to just go. Then I would at least know where I stand. I did it once, right?